Midlife Women

Issues, interests and inspiration for midlife women. Aging parents, adult children, grandchildren, travel, midlife reinvention, health & fitness, recipes, entertainment.

The 2 favorite Christmas gifts I bought for others, favorite jeans and necklace, great books to read and shows to watch on Netflix

Midlife Women

This & That #3

Merry Christmas! It won’t be long now! Are you ready? I spent most of this week doing lots of Christmas stuff with the family.

I went to the Grandparent’s picnic at Parker’s school. Really not loving my hair here. This assymetrical look may have to go!

Parker had a football tournament on Saturday. It was cold for Houston (55 and windy), so Maddie & I stayed home and baked. We made Pecan Fingers., the cookie Tony’s mom always made every Christmas and it’s his favorite. It’s so fun to pass down this holiday tradition to the next generation!

Here are Jeffrey and Tony at the football game. Glad J has a hat and is bundled up!

In the midst of all the sweets, I’m still trying to eat plenty of greens. I tried this Honeycrisp Apple Salad from The Mommy Mouse Clubhouse. Delicious!

The kids went to get their pictures taken with Santa and let me take a few pictures of them in front of the tree before they left. I call this pose the “choke-hold” of love.

AND…. I made a list of everything I need to do to get ready for Christmas. We are hosting 12 people for dinner. I am trying to do a little bit every day so I don’t end up tired, stressed and cranky on Christmas Day. Not that that has ever happened. Well, there was the one year I had a meltdown and ended up in the closet……but that’s a story for another day.

So… I set one of the tables and got out all the serving pieces I will use and labeled them. Feels good to have one thing crossed off the list!

And I finally got around to writing a post about this delicious hot chocolate recipe I developed – Fireball Mexican Hot Chocolate! Totally decadent and made with Fireball Cinnamon Whiskey – YUM!

This post contains some affiliate links for your convenience. If you purchase a product through my link, I may receive a small commission, at no extra cost to you.

Two of the most popular gift guides I have put together are Gifts for Elderly Moms and Gifts for Elderly Dads. I remember after my Dad moved into assisted living, he just didn’t need or have room for a lot of “stuff”, but I still wanted to get him a little something for special occasions. Here are the most popular gifts for elderly people from those guides:

DayClox – The Original Memory Loss Digital Calendar Day Clock with Extra Large Non-Abbreviated Day & Month.

Hog Wild Peeramid Bookrest

Socks Master™ Easy-Reach Shoehorn & Sock Donning Device

I watched a little Netflix:

The Crown – I don’t think I like this season as well as last, but it’s still really good.

The Ranch with Sam Elliot and Ashton Kutcher. I’m on Season 2. It’s one of those shows that I thought would be really dumb, but since it got such great reviews, I gave it a try and have thoroughly enjoyed it.

The Great British Baking Show – I love watching all kinds of cooking shows.

Here are reviews of my favorite shows on Netflix and Amazon Prime.

And I’m DVR-ing some of my favorite Christmas movies – White Christmas, Love Actually, You’ve Got Mail, and That Thing You Do. Ok – You’ve Got Mail & That Thing You Do are not exactly a Christmas movies, but I love them and usually have time to just sit around and watch a movie or two the week between Christmas and the New Year. What are your must-see Christmas movies?

Finally, a shout out to my favorite son-in-law, Mike on his 29th birthday. These poor December babies don’t get much attention on their birthdays. Remember this post? When You Don’t Like Your Child’s Partner. Well, we are blessed that we LOVE this guy. He’s perfect for our daughter. He’s a wonderful husband and father. And since he’s been hanging around our house since he was 15, we take part of the credit for raising him! Happy Birthday, Mike!

Signing off until after the Holidays! I’m wrapping up year two of My Side of 50. It gives me such joy to create content for you every week and I am thrilled and overwhelmed that you would read my blog, comment, and share. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

Wishing you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

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December 19, 2017 1 comment

Midlife Women

This & That #2

What a crazy week full of surprises, fun, Christmas gifts and loss….

The biggest surprise of the week: SNOW in Houston!

I know, I know – some of you are from places way north of Texas where snow can become a nuisance because you have so much of it all winter long. But Y’ALL – this is Texas! And it snowed and stuck to the ground and we got to make snowmen and have snowball fights and it’s almost Christmas…..It was a party here for a day!

Seriously, we were up at the crack of dawn watching it come down.

Tony got Parker up at 5 a.m. and showed him how to make a snowman. Tony is a native of Milwaukee and has seen PLENTY of snow in his lifetime. I was surprised at how excited HE was! Parker told me last night that is he praying for it to snow on Christmas. Now that would be something….

This post contains some affiliate links for your convenience. If you purchase a product through my link, I may receive a small commission, at no extra cost to you.

Most fun of the week

The Annual Favorite Things Christmas Luncheon that my girlfriends and I do every year. We take turns hosting in our homes and all bring a dish to share. My Melange of Fruits gets requested every year.

If I was a good blogger, I would have taken LOTS of pictures to share with you. But I got so involved in the conversation, food, presents and maybe a little wine that I forgot to take EVEN ONE! So I’ll just have to tell you how our group does it:

We each choose our “favorite thing” for that year ($30 limit) and buy three of them.
We wrap our 3 gifts and take them to the party.
At the party, we write our names on 3 pieces of paper and put them in a bowl.
Then each person draws 3 names.
You get one of the gifts that each of your 3 people brought.
We go around the room and take turns telling each other why the gift we chose is our favorite that year!

All the gifts were lovely, fun and so appreciated by the recipients. But there are two that I wanted to share with you.

One of the “girlfriends” is 92-year-old British woman named Myrtle. I received her gift which was a box of her favorite biscuits (cookies) and a $30 gift card to Trader Joe’s. Don’t think I won’t be using THAT this holiday season!

I also received Look by M Shawl Vest. This vest can be worn 4 different ways – as a vest, shawl, poncho or wrap. It comes in lots of colors and all the ladies at the party SWEAR by it and say everybody needs one!

Favorite Christmas Item

I picked up this plush Nativity Set on a whim at Hobby Lobby a couple of weeks ago. I thought it would be fun for the two younger grandkids to play with and a way to start introducing them to the story of Jesus’ birth. Isn’t it cute when I have it all set up? Unfortunately, it never looks this way. It looks more like this:

Well… I DID get it for them to PLAY with. I can’t find this exact set, but there are several other cute ones here.

Best Date (We look better with a filter)

Date night with Tony at our favorite neighborhood restaurant. We like the food so much, I decided to order their Prime Rib for our Christmas Dinner. This is the first time I have been able to shake my mom’s tradition of making everything yourself. But I know if being able to order really good food from a restaurant was an option in her day, she would have been the first to do so! She was all about enjoying her guests and that’s what I intend to do this year. With 3 grandkids, there will be lots of toys to put together and play with.

Favorite Visitor

Santa, aka as 10-month-old Jeffrey….Can you stand all that cuteness????

Saddest Moment

We lost a dear friend to cancer this week. It was a long and painful battle. We rejoice that because he is a follower of Jesus we can be assured that he is now in Heaven enjoying a perfect body that is not diseased or causing him pain. But we deal with the reality of a big hole in the lives of us and all he left behind.

Do you ever get stuck on what to do for friends who have lost someone? I used to get paralyzed by not wanting to say or do “the wrong thing”. However, when I lost my parents in 2015, I learned that there isn’t much someone can do or say to make it worse. And that any gesture, no matter how small can bring comfort and blessing into a very dark time. So I wrote this post: 19 Practical Ways To Help When Someone You Know Dies.

And here is how I know we will see our dear friend in Heaven someday: Why The Resurrection Gives Me Hope.

Looking for something special to wear to a holiday party? Take a look at these gorgeous looks from Misook!

Need help planning your holiday menu? Get my 7 Favorite Holiday Recipes here!

Do you still need a few gifts for those on your list? Here is some inspiration:

Christmas Gifts for Elderly Fathers

Christmas Gifts for Elderly Mothers

Best Gifts for Boys Ages 8-10

10 Absolute Best Gifts for New Homeowners

Gifts for the Beer Lover

What Gifts Do College Kids Want for Christmas?

30+ Great Gifts for Millennials

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December 12, 2017 7 comments

Midlife Women

This & That #1

This post contains some affiliate links for your convenience. If you purchase a product through my link, I may receive a small commission, at no extra cost to you. I so appreciate every click-through and purchase! Every little bit helps to keep My Side of 50 up and running!

Welcome to This & That, a new feature I’m adding to My Side of 50. This & That posts will cover things about what I’m doing, liking, & thinking about that may not fit into a regular blog post.

Like these cute Turkey Donuts my grandkids made for Thanksgiving…

I had planned to take Thanksgiving week off. And boy did I – that week and the week after too because I was down with what I thought was a cold. It was a cold, but one that resulted in two trips to the doctor and four prescriptions. So needless to say, I spent most of the end of November in bed or on the couch.

I did manage to rally for a few hours so that we could spend Thanksgiving Day with extended family at our friend’s home on Lake Conroe north of Houston. It was the most beautiful day at the loveliest home with all of our favorite people.

Here’s a picture of granddaughter Maddie and me. I’m wearing my NYJD Marilyn Jeans, which have been my “uniform” this fall. I love that the rise is high, they hold in my tummy in and are so stretchy and comfortable, even after eating a huge Thanksgiving feast. They are 30% off at Nordstrom and also come in Petite and Plus Sizes (25% off).

I know you’re going to ask about my necklace which is my FAVORITE purchase of this fall. I wear it all the time. It’s an INC Concepts Silver Tone Hammered Metal Pebble Statement Necklace. Get it here.

All that time I spent in bed? Here’s what I did:

I GOT ALL MY CHRISTMAS SHOPPING DONE AND I SAVED MONEY.

There WERE all the Black Friday Sales…. and that coupled with my cash back from Ebates, helped me buy lots of things for family (and for me) while staying within our Christmas budget.

I know I tell you about Ebates all the time, but Y’ALL – this time of year, stores offer a CRAZY percentage of cash back on all your purchases. As in you’ll get a check for that actual amount.

There are over 600 stores that offer cash back with Ebates. I got between 6-10% back at the stores where I shop. See what you can get at the stores where you shop and sign up here!

Favorite Christmas presents that I bought:

Kitty Tails – A Jellycat Softcloth Fabric Book. This is for 10-month-old grandson, Jeffrey who so enjoys books with lots of textures to feel and that he can stick in his mouth. If you are buying for a baby, get one of these books. If kitties aren’t his thing, there are Dino Tails, Farm Tails, Fish Tails and loads more.

The perfect gift for my husband. Before I tell you what it is, I need to preface this with after almost 34 years of marriage, neither one of us usually waits for Christmas or our birthday to get something we want. We just order it from Amazon! That combined with the fact that my husband never wants anything makes him extremely hard to buy for.

So this year I ordered a Shutterfly Photo Book. Ever heard of Shutterfly? If you haven’t, it’s a service where you can just upload your pictures to their site and they create an album for you.

This is perfect for Tony, because he doesn’t really want to look at a picture on your phone (mostly because he can never find his glasses) or on the computer. He’s so old school. He actually appreciates a printed picture.

This is perfect for me because it’s so easy. All I did was upload my pictures, chose a layout and in one day I had a proof that I edited a bit and ordered. If you enjoy the whole scrapbooking experience, you can totally personalize your photo book with all their fun editing tools. Or if your are even LESS interested in creating a photo book yourself, just upload your book and Shutterfly will do it for you – even culling through your photos to get rid of the duplicates and blurry ones.

The prices are great and with Ebates you get 7% back.

I can’t wait to get mine and Tony will love it!

What I read:

Long Way Gone by Charles Martin, author of The Mountain Between Us, which I also loved. It’s a love story. A prodigal son story. A story of redemption that takes place in the mountains of Colorado and Nashville. I just adore Martin’s writing. He writes the kind of books that don’t take time to “get into”. You are hooked on his story from the first page.

The Surrogate by Louise Jensen is a totally different kind of book. It’s a psychological thriller with all kinds of twists and turns. And the bad guy isn’t who you think it is!

What I watched on Netflix:

Mudbound starring Mary J. Blige. She is so good in this and you would never know that it was her. She just morphs into her character so thoroughly. It’s about two families, one white and one black who are bound together in the tough world of working the land in the South during and after World War II. Loved this movie.

Broadchurch a British crime drama. Each season starts with a crime and with every episode you get closer to unraveling “who done it”. I’m on Season 3.

Godless – I am addicted to this western that takes place around the mines of Colorado. In this show, Jeff Bridges is the BAD GUY. Maybe he’s played the bad guy before, but I’ve never seen it. It also stars Michelle Dockery who played Mary on Downtown Abbey, another one of my favorites.

I’m also looking forward to new episodes of The Crown and House of Cards. Even though Kevin Spacey will be written out of House of Cards because of allegations of sexual misconduct, they are going to carry on. So glad because I think Robin Wright is FABULOUS in her role.

Speaking of the parade of famous men who are going down (and rightly so) because of numerous allegations of sexual misconduct….

I was on the couch in front of the TV all day the day Matt Lauer went down. And all I could think was “My Gawwwdddd… why would any of you guys think that the things you were doing were appropriate in the workplace or anywhere else???? Have you never been taught any better? If not, let me help you.

Let’s start with your PENIS. Surely you don’t mind TALKING about your PENIS because you certainly don’t have a problem SHOWING it to everybody.

Don’t do that. We’ve all seen a penis. Yours is not special. I know you think it is, but it’s not. And if you are thinking some woman is going to jump your bones just because you whipped it out, that’s probably not going to happen. They just think you are gross. Because you are.

Think you need to touch someone in the workplace? Before you do, ask yourself if where you are planning to place your hands (or your penis or any other part of your body) is at or near their “bathing suit area”. We tell kids all the time that others are not allowed to touch them in their bathing suit area. That goes for you too and that also goes for WHOEVER you are thinking of touching. How about, unless you are shaking hands, do not touch ANYONE AT WORK.

Still not clear? If you wouldn’t touch your daughter or your mother that way, don’t touch people that you work with in that way.

Same thing goes for what you say – if you wouldn’t say it:

To your mother or daughter
In front of your mother or daughter
In church

Then don’t frickin’ say it.

That feels better. I’ve been wanting to say all that for a long time….for all the good it will do.

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December 5, 2017 16 comments

Midlife Women

Bridging the Gap | Introducing Sami Davis | The Unexpected Type

Today is the launch of Bridging the Gap which is bringing together 200 influencers from multiple demographics in an unprecedented campaign for social change. The focus is uniting Millennial and Midlife Bloggers in something called Reciprocal Mentorship.

What exactly is Reciprocal Mentorship? It’s a new and empowered way of bringing the generations together by each sharing their unique gifts with the other. Why? Because we have so much to learn from each other!

My Bridging the Gap Partner is Sami Davis, the creative, beautiful and talented blogger behind The Unexpected Type.

Sami is a Southern California girl who has cultivated a creative lifestyle from a very young age. She grew up dabbling in paint and other creative media and knew her career would have to have a huge artistic impact.

After achieving a degree in Visual Communications at The Fashion Institute of Design and Marketing, she gained experience in marketing, graphic design, event management, product styling + fine arts all the while cultivating her experimental aesthetic. Sami’s approach is innovative and full of emotion, with direct influence from the shapes of the flora and fauna which surround all of us.

Sami loves to style food + props. I would love for her to tutor me in this art. This beautiful photograph is from her post Apps with Reese Specialty Foods.

She has a fashion hat collection with 12 hats.

My favorite thing about Sami is her mission to elevate what the world thinks “beautiful” means and encourage thinking outside all bounds. Bringing art + creative ambition to all aspects of life makes her heart the happiest!

Sami can be found at:

Instagram

Etsy

You might also like:

Bridging the Gap with Cathy of My Side of 50

Six Things I Would Tell My 20-Something Self

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October 17, 2017 15 comments

Midlife Women

11 Questions To Ask BEFORE You Hire an Estate Sale Company

Estate Sales (Tag Sales) are held when someone wants to sell most or all of their possessions. Common reasons for having an estate sale are downsizing, divorce, relocation or you are managing someone’s estate. If you have the time and enough help, you can conduct the estate sale yourself. Or you can hire a company that specializes in estate sales. When I helped my dad downsize before moving into assisted living in 2015, I hired a local estate sale company and had a good experience. But that is not always the case. First, we will look at what estate sale companies actually do and then I’ll give you 10 Questions to Ask BEFORE You Hire an estate sale company

What will an Estate Sale Company actually do?

Estate Sales are usually held over a weekend – Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

Prior to the sale, the company will price and display items in a way to ensure you get the best possible price.

Experienced professionals know:

The market value of items.
What estate sale shoppers are looking for.
How to display your items so that they are sold.

They will advertise your sale. Getting the right people in the door is key to a great sale. Companies will advertise on their website, through traditional channels like newspapers and Craig’s List, social media and through their own e-mail/mailing list. Having a large e-mail list is a good sign because these are your target customers – people who shop estate sales and want what you have to sell.

They will staff the sale, handle the money and keep detailed records of what was sold and for how much.

They will provide security during the sale. Maybe not actual police or security guards, but employees who are trained in all the tricks thieves use to shoplift or switch tags during the sale.

They will clean up after the sale.

For an extra fee, they will dispose of what did not sell. They will take what is trash to the appropriate place and donate other items to charity, providing you with a tax receipt for that donation.

They will send you a check for your percentage of the proceeds within 30 days.

How do you find an estate sale company? Click To Tweet

How do you find an Estate Sale Company?

Recommendations from someone is a great place to start. Your Realtor, a probate attorney or a friend can provide a recommendation. When I am looking for a “professional anything”, I always start with posting something on Facebook to see if any of my friends can recommend someone they have used.

Do a Google Search or go to a site like estatesales.net where you can type in your zip code and get a listing of companies in your area. Prioritize companies that have a website with a list of services, photos of staff, photos and listings from previous sales. Since exposure is imperative for a great estate sale, you are looking for a company that knows how to market.

Interview several on the phone and then choose 2 or 3 to interview in person.

When you meet in person, the company personnel will look over the items you have to sell and evaluate if it will be a profitable sale for both the company and you. Don’t be surprised if you show them items that you think are valuable that they say are not.

For example, my parents traveled a lot during their lives and brought home many items from overseas. One was a cuckoo clock from Germany that my father always thought would be “worth something” someday. It turns out that many people their age traveled to Europe and brought home these same type clocks. Since lots of estate sales have these for sale, they are not nearly as valuable as he thought.

11 questions to ask before you hire an estate sale company. Click To Tweet

Here are 11 Questions to Ask Before You Hire An Estate Sale Company:

Are they a legitimate business? Do they have business cards and a tax ID#?
Can they provide references?
Are they bonded and insured?
How long have they been in business?
How do they handle sales tax, if your state requires that it be collected?
Do they have the right equipment like tables and display cases?
What percentage do they get?

There are typically no up-front costs. You will sign a contract with the company and agree that they get a certain percentage of the proceeds – 25-50%. Pricing is usually based on the part of the country you are in, the estimated value of the items and how much work it will be for the company.

Is the percentage they charge a reasonable amount for your area? Ask around, but remember, cheaper isn’t always better. You often get what you pay for in the area of expertise and services offered.

Are there extra fees for things like extra staff, clean-up after the sale and handling donations to charity? The clean-up and handling donations to charity were services I gladly paid for. Just make sure you know what your extra costs will be upfront.

Do they have a contract for you to sign? If they don’t, that’s a big red flag! Always get a contract. Read it carefully and make sure the company can explain everything in it in a way that you can understand exactly what you are getting.
How are they staffed? Do they have employees or do they hire contract workers for the sale?
Are they set up to accept credit cards? You will sell more if people can pay with a credit card.
Do they bring in extra items to YOUR sale? This is a big no-no! They should be focused on selling YOUR items, not their own or other customers.

Other things to remember:

Know that reputable estate sale companies book several months in advance, so as soon as you see that an estate sale is in your future, start “shopping around”.

Don’t “clean up” or throw ANYTHING away before meeting with the estate sale company. You would be amazed at what people buy – cleaning supplies that are half full, doorknobs that don’t work, out of date light fixtures…Let the company try to sell everything. Anything that doesn’t sell can be disposed of later.

For an even more thorough screening, you can check with the Better Business Bureau to see if there are any complaints filed against them. While there are many legitimate companies who are NOT members of the BBB, it doesn’t hurt to check.

Before you interview a company, allow friends and family time to get all of the items out that they want. Estate sale companies price according to the profit they think they can make and after you sign the contract, will ask that nothing else be removed.

I had a number of people in our family’s circle who requested items AFTER the contract was signed. Many times they would ask my dad if they could have them and he said yes. Why wouldn’t he? It was his stuff. But you have to make sure everyone understands the terms set by the company and that they need to get these items BEFORE you sign the contract.

Don’t attend the estate sale. Many companies will not allow it. You don’t want to be there hearing comments about you or your loved one’s décor or hear people haggle over the price of something that means a lot to you. Leave it to the professionals who know what they are doing.

Not sure you want to hire an estate sale company? Check out this post:

Estate Sales | Do-It-Yourself or Hire a Company?

Want to know more? Get my expanded list: 22 Questions To Ask BEFORE Hiring An Estate Sale Company.

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October 16, 2017 3 comments

Midlife Women

Estate Sales | Do-It-Yourself or Hire A Company?

In June 2015, a few months after my mom died, my dad decided that keeping their home of 36 years was getting to be too much and that was time to sell it and move into assisted living. So we hired a realtor and got ready to put the house on the market. And I started thinking about estate sales as a way to sell the items that dad couldn’t take with him and no one in the family wanted.

Here’s how the rest of the story was supposed to go in my mind.

We would put the house on the market and have a contract at asking price within a week.
In 30 days the house would close.
Before the 30 days were up, we’d hire an estate sale company to sell the items Dad couldn’t take with him, clear out the house leaving it in move-in condition for the new owners and deposit a hefty check for the proceeds of the sale.

Don’t you just love fantasy? I hope so because all of the above was TRULY a fantasy.

I knew nothing about estate sales except that people had them when they downsized, divorced or someone died.

So…I got on the internet and started trying to find a local estate sale company. I called several and found that most of the local companies were booked 2 or 3 months in advance. So if I scheduled one of those and the house sold quickly, I ran the risk of having to sell everything myself before closing.

I had to consider the pros and cons of conducting the estate sale myself OR waiting to hire a company. Here are some things to consider if you are you in trying to make that decision for yourself.

Estate Sales (Tag Sales) are held when someone can no longer keep all of the “stuff” they have accumulated. It is usually held at a time in a person’s life when there has been a death, divorce or the time has come to downsize.

This is something that may seem like nothing more than a big garage sale. Why not do it yourself? That is certainly a possibility. But there are several ways that estate sales are different from garage sales.

Garage sales are smaller and are filled with items you WANT to get rid of.
Estate sales are much larger and involve a majority of one’s possessions. You are selling most of the items because it has become a necessity. Not because you want to.
In an estate sale, some of the items you sell have personal and sentimental value.

So, is an estate sale something you should tackle on your own? Before taking on this task, it’s important to ask these questions:

Will I make more money if I don’t have to pay a commission to an estate sale company?

You might. Companies usually take 25-50% of the gross from estate sale proceeds. But there are other things to consider:

Pricing is important and will be a big factor in how much you will make.

Do you have a background in appraisal that will enable you to determine items of true monetary value and what people will pay for them? That Hummel collection of grandmas is worth a lot less than you think.

Are you experienced enough with estate sales to know what people who shop them are willing to purchase?

Many things that the average person thinks are valuable are typically not the most popular items at an estate sale. Why? Because items like china, crystal, silver and collectibles are sold at EVERY estate sale. Being so widely available decreases their value.

But items like rusty hinges, half bottles of shampoo and Tupperware from the 70’s may be just what people are looking for! Seriously. This is not hyperbole! Things that you would throw in the trash are sometimes what people want.

Do you have the time?

Most estate sales are held over the weekend – Friday, Saturday, and Sunday – all day.

In planning the sale, you’ll need time (maybe a month, if you don’t have other responsibilities (like a full-time job and a family) to go through every nook and cranny of the home and decide what to keep and what will be sold.

Items will need to be priced and displayed. Do you have a number of tables, display cases and hanging racks on which to display items?

Do you know how to display items in the best way to get the best price?

Do you have enough muscle?

Do you have people who will help you carry stuff up from the basement, down from the attic and move heavy furniture and appliances?

How will you advertise?

One of the major factors in a successful estate sale is getting the right people in the door.

You can put something on Facebook and Craig’s list.

You can tell your friends and family.

But you need buyers who buy estate sale items and these may not be the same people who would respond to your marketing.

Do you have enough people to help?

In addition to help pre-sale, you need people at the sale to take money, do crowd control (not let too many people in at one time) and provide security.

Shoplifting and tag switching are common at estate sales and thieves are adept at what they do. Do you know what to look for or how to spot a thief?

Do you have a thick skin?

How will you feel after a day or so of listening to comments about you or your loved one’s taste in home décor or disputing the price of items that hold great personal value to you?

Are you able to process credit card payments?

You can make it a cash-only sale, but you will typically sell more if people can pay with a credit card.

Does your neighborhood allow estate sales?

What are the parking regulations in your community?

If someone were to get hurt on your property during the sale, will your homeowner’s policy cover that?

If your neighborhood does NOT allow estate sales, there are companies that will load up all the items and sell them off-site or at an online auction.

What will you do with items that aren’t sold?

Do you have the time, manpower, vehicle and muscle to deliver the leftovers to the dump or to a charity? Or do you know a charity that will pick these items up?

What about cleanup and preparing the house for sale, if that is your plan?

If after considering these questions, you’ve decided to hire an Estate Sale Company and NOT go the DIY route, how do you find the best one? I’ll cover that next week in 11 Things to Ask BEFORE You Hire An Estate Sale Company.

Like this post? Think an estate sale might be in your future? Pin it!

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October 10, 2017 6 comments

Midlife Women

Six Things I Would Say To My Twenty-Something Self

Recently I was asked to take part in an unprecedented campaign for women called “Bridging the Gap,” where 100 millennial and 100 midlife influencers are coming together with the purpose of to blurring the boundaries of age. As part of this, I was paired with a talented Millenial Blogger named Sami Davis from An Unexpected Type.

I’ll be writing more about Sami and the campaign in a special post, but let me tell you about how the topic of this week’s post came about.

Sami and I wanted to do more than feature each other on our respective blogs. We wanted to point our readers to content that would be of interest to them on each other’s blogs.

Sami told me that her readers were particularly interested in personal growth and learning from other women. So she came up with a set of questions for me. Here are Six Things I Would Tell my 20-Something Self.

What 3 pieces of advice would you give to your 20-something self (and us growing girls now)?

Know Your Worth

Don’t know what your worth? I do. You were created by God, who is perfect, in His image. You have been given a beautiful heart, soul, and spirit. You have been given gifts and talents that are uniquely yours for the plan He has for you. You have a purpose for being here. The world would not be the same without you.

Your worth is not determined by your age, size, race, family of origin, education, health, intellectual ability, athletic ability, economic status or your past.

Own Your Worth

It’s one thing to know your worth. It’s quite another to own it. Owning your worth means requiring everyone around you to treat you like a person of great value deserving of respect on every level.

It's one thing to know your worth. It's quite another to own it. Click To Tweet

Your feelings
Your time
Your body
Your possessions
Your emotions
Your health

It means getting paid what you’re worth. And unfortunately, you will probably always have to ask to be paid for what you are worth. Very few people will pay you what you’re worth on their own. You have to know your value as an employee and team member and ask for it.

It means requiring everyone you come in contact with to treat you with dignity and respect.
Not putting up with demeaning comments.
Calling out people who get in your personal space or touch you inappropriately. Which may mean reporting them to people in authority in the workplace or law enforcement.
Not allowing others to dehumanize you by calling you names (and no, – oh he was just mad that one time is not an excuse).
Not standing you up.
Or taking advantage of your financially.
Or using you for personal gain.

Always Have Your Own Money

If you marry, you will likely pool all your money into one household account. And that’s not a bad thing. But always have a little set aside for yourself. Money is power. And if someone else has total control over all your finances, you have given away some of your power.

Hopefully, you will marry someone who loves you, is totally trustworthy and would never abandon you. Or get sick. Or die. But we don’t live in a perfect world, so having a little money set aside for you and your children is very empowering. If the worst happens, you’ll be prepared.

What was one of your biggest mistakes that you learned the most from?

I made lots of mistakes and I know I learned some hard lessons from them, but I just can’t seem to recall them all now. (We call this the selective memory loss that comes with age). But what I do know is that it was usually one or more of these things that led to those mistakes:

Caring too much about pleasing people and wanting to be liked led to not standing up for myself and demanding to be valued – by a man, an employer or group of “friends”. Or engaging in behavior that wasn’t good for me or went against my own moral compass to go along with the crowd.

Drinking too much

Yes, it’s fun and relaxing to have a drink or two. But whenever I drank past a little buzz, I opened myself up to a world of trouble. Best case scenario – I had a headache the next day. Worst case – I embarrassed myself and my judgment was impaired. I look back at those instances now and see how I was putting myself at risk for so many things. Nothing good ever happened when I drank too much.

Not nurturing my relationship with God

This goes along with that whole moral compass thing. When I neglected my faith by not being around people who shared those same values, it was way too easy to stray from the timeless principles I had been taught. And those moments never ended well.

What is your favorite memory from your 20’s?

I just remember my senior year in college. I was ready to graduate. Get a job. Be a grownup. But I cherish that last year with my college girlfriends. There is something special about the friends you make in college. The friends from those pivotal years where you are growing up and learning who you are. We had some fun times (that we can only remember bits and pieces of when we get together these days) and they were the best.

What was the most difficult “adulting” moment you had in your 20’s? For me, it was putting my big girl pants on and figuring out taxes for a freelance job. (Numbers + me… not great.)

When my Dad gave me new tires for my car for my birthday. A very generous and much-needed gift, but certainly not the fun gifts I was accustomed to receiving!

I feel like I’ve lost and gained SO many friends at this stage in my life– what’s your biggest piece of advice on friendship?

There are some friends that are lifelong friends. And there are some friends that are in your life for a season. Don’t be too bothered about those that come and go at different times in your life. It’s not personal. It’s not weird. It’s just what happens as you move, change & grow.

And as Oprah says, “When someone shows you who they are, believe them”.

Any advice on careers and trying to figure out where we belong in the workforce?

I graduated with a Bachelor of Music Education Degree. When I got my first job teaching elementary music, I liked it well enough. But I have a vivid memory of driving home from work one day thinking to myself, “I cannot do this for the rest of my life”. But the thing is, you don’t HAVE to stay in ANY job for the rest of your life.

I’ve done lots of different paid and non-paid jobs. Stay-at-home mom, volunteer, piano teacher, tutor, non-profit executive and now a blogger/influencer. The one common thread is that I have learned something at every job that prepared me for the next one.

I learned something at every job that prepared me for the next one. Click To Tweet

What about you – the My Side of 50 tribe? What would you add? I’d love to hear your answers to these questions in the comments below!

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October 3, 2017 9 comments

Midlife Women

How to Pray for Victims of Hurricane Harvey

I am a native Houstonian. I have seen every hurricane and storm since Hurricane Carla in 1961 when I was 3 years old. Hurricanes, flooding, tornados – these are nothing new to Texas. But there has never been anything on the scale of Hurricane Harvey. And it’s not just Texas – it’s Louisiana with this one as well.

My entire family escaped what so many are suffering. Our homes were not flooded. We only lost power for a short time. Other than a little cabin fever we are ok.

The outpouring of love we have witnessed both from outside and inside our communities has warmed my heart. Over the past couple of years, we have seen so much hate and vitriol in our country. Could God have used this in some way to change the conversation? I don’t know, but I am so encouraged about the positivity and love and graciousness and kindness in the midst of this tragedy.

I spent 25 years working in nonprofits in Houston, so my original idea was to write a post on which organizations to donate to and how to evaluate a charity before giving. I know a lot about that, but so do a lot of other people. You can read some of those guidelines here.

Instead, I decided to write a post on how to pray for the people who suffered loss as a result of Hurricane Harvey. Because that’s the first thing we should do. And after we’ve donated and volunteered and helped and listened and sympathized and encouraged that’s all we can do. And it’s the BEST thing we can do.

Here is my list of things to pray about today and through the months to come. Because it’s going to take more than a couple of weeks to get through this. Long after they stop talking about it 24 hours a day on the news.

Thank God for his mercy. He was there. He never left us and He is here now, working through people.
Thank God for His love that has been poured out through people across the world. What would we do if we were not loved and cared for?
Pray that God would provide places to live for people who need it.
Pray for government agencies to work efficiently and quickly to meet the many needs these communities have.
Pray that God would protect families who are rebuilding from unethical and incompetent contractors and tradesmen. After a disaster, these types swarm into devastated communities, do shoddy work, incomplete work and take off with the money.
Pray for our first responders who are exhausted. Many left their own flooded homes to help us.
Pray for those who are grieving the loss. Most put on a brave face and say things like “stuff can be replaced”. And that is true. But when it’s YOUR stuff, it’s hard.
Pray for kids. If your parents are stressed out and things are uncertain, it’s hard.
Pray for kids and teachers. Schools will open again and be full of teachers and kids who have suffered loss. How does one concentrate on learning or teaching in the midst of devastation? Schools have been flooded. Everything will be topsy turvy in our educational system for a while. Pray for God’s peace and order.
Pray for local businesses. There has been great loss in our area businesses. It will be hard to get up and running again. The ladies who clean my house weren’t able to get here this week. (That is only a tragedy if you’re me :). Seriously – I think about the people who only get paid when they work, paid by the job, don’t have vacation days and sick leave. If you are one of these people and you are out of work, you are in a world of hurt. I will be paying them for this week. If someone like this works for you and didn’t make it in this week, consider paying them anyway if you are able.
Pray for our government officials who have to make a lot of decisions – that God would guide each and every one and give them wisdom. That they would seek Him and He would show them what to do.
Thank God for all the churches, businesses and nonprofit organizations who have mobilized to help. Pray God’s blessing on them and that He would direct each on how to use their time, expertise and resources in the most efficient manner.
Pray against donor fatigue – and that also goes for volunteer fatigue. At some point, you just get tired of hearing about Hurricane Harvey. Then there will be another disaster somewhere to take our attention. All the while people here still need lots of help.

This post contains some affiliate links for your convenience. If you purchase a product through my link, I may receive a small commission, at no extra cost to you.

This was in my reading of Jesus Calling this week. So appropriate. Isn’t the Lord so good that way? Just showing up with exactly what you need to hear.

“Trust me to supply what you need when you need it”

Because of the Lord’s great love, we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.”

The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord. – Lamentations 3:22-26

Yes – we serve a Lord of compassion and faithfulness. Always faithful.

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August 31, 2017 12 comments

Favorite Podcasts That Motivate and Inspire

Midlife Women

6 Podcasts That Motivate And Inspire

I love PODCASTS that motivate and inspire me! I listen to them all the time. When I am getting ready in the morning. When I am doing chores. When I am driving. They stimulate me with their ideas and inspire me to be all God created me to be. They challenge me to think in new ways. They entertain me and sometimes give me a chuckle or two.

These days, I mostly listen to podcasts that feed me spiritually, inspire me as a midlife woman or teach me something about my passion – blogging! And this week, I actually was INTERVIEWED for my favorite podcast for midlife women – Midlife Schmidlife with host, Liz Applegate. In this episode, I talk about the loss of my parents last year, the start of this blog and the fun and adventure of trying new things when you are 50+. What an exciting time of life this is! You can listen here.

6 Podcasts That Motivate and Inspire

My interview on #midlifeschmidlife on loss, being brave and learning new things after 50. Click To Tweet

On Midlife Schmidlife, Liz talks to women about the midlife transition and reinvention many go through at this time in their lives. It runs the gamut – exploring passions and pursuing a new career, telling yourself the truth and not being afraid are common themes. The women interviewed are real-life women like you and me and their stories are inspirational and hopeful.

One Verse Devotional

These 5-minute devotionals by Matt McCarrick focus on one Bible verse a day. There is always some great nugget to chew on and apply. Matt presents in a conversational way. I don’t fell like he is talking “to” me. Rather I feel like I’m in the middle of a conversation with someone who is presenting his understanding of the Bible in a way that is humble and engaging. If I don’t have time for anything else, I can listen to this one while I brush my teeth – which most of the time I do!

Daily Radio Program with Charles Stanley

Dr. Charles Stanley has a warm and engaging way of teaching the Bible. He doesn’t always tell you what your want to hear, but he tells you the truth – just like your Dad would. In fact, when he wants to make a point, he often says “Now listen to me.”, which is what my own Dad used to say to me. Maybe that’s why I like him so much.

Daily Hope with Rick Warren

Rick Warren is the author of the bestseller, The Purpose Driven Life. These excerpts from his sermons at Saddleback Church in California feature Rick breaking down Biblical truths in a way that is easy to understand. Rick always offers a practical way to implement these truths, which I appreciate.

I Teach Blogging

Renee Groskreutz is a WordPress and Blogging Guru. I have learned about all aspects of blogging from her – the technical side, about WordPress, SEO, content, social media – literally everything. I listened to her podcast even before I started my blog. She teaches in a way that is easy to understand for the beginner. Yet a blogger with any amount of experience can learn much.

Create If Writing

Writer and Blogger, Kirsten Oliphint teaches from her many years of experience as first a writer and then a blogger. Topics such as building your list, finding your audience, and the creative process of writing are some of the topics that you’ll find on this podcast. Kirsten also shares about mistakes she has made in this blogging journey. One of my favorite episodes is the one where she shares $1300 worth of mistakes she made in 2015! She communicates with humor and honesty.

Do you listen to podcasts? What are your favorites? Tell me in the comments. I’m always looking for new ones.

July 31, 2016 55 comments

Midlife Women

Be Brave & Be Open

Is there something you’ve always wanted to do that for some reason, you haven’t tried? Are you passionate about something but have not pursued it because you are afraid? As a midlife woman on this side of 50, I am working on being brave. Being open. Not automatically saying no to things. Daring to try things I want to try, no matter what others may think.

Is there something that you've always wanted to do but haven't tried? Click To Tweet

Be Brave & Be Open

On this side or 50, I am working on being brave and open. Click To Tweet

Easier said than done, but I’m moving in that direction.

Today, I am honored to guest post on Sue Loncaric’s blog, Sizzling Toward Sixty. Sue is an Aussie who believes that age is just a number and shouldn’t hold you back from reaching your full potential. I wholeheartedly agree.

You can read my guest post, Be Brave & Be Open here! While you are over at Sizzling Toward Sixty, check out Sue’s #couchpotatotofabfit community on Facebook. I’m a member and we encourage each other as we maintain our health in community. We’d love to have you join us!

June 16, 2016 7 comments