Podcast

My Side of 50 Podcast

Episode 6 | The Midlife Pivot with Ruthie Gray

Ruthie Gray has been my business coach for several years and my online friend for even longer than that.

She is a wife, mother of four adult kids, Gigi to two precious grandkids, and now an empty nester who mentors moms in home and business at RuthieGray.Mom.

Ruthie specializes in relational marketing and is the founder of the Community Marketing Framework System, taught inside her Authentic Marketing Membership.

Ruthie is also the host of the Authentic Online Marketing Podcast.

BUT….this is where she is NOW. In this episode, we talk about all the twists, turns and pivots she’s made both professionally and personally since she started launching her kids into the world.

Rekindling her love of writing through blogging.
Pivoting into her own business as an Instagram and Business Coach.
And the big pivot into a full-time caregiver for both of her parents.

Ruthie gets real in this episode about the “summer of surrender” when she pivoted from mentoring moms through her blog to starting a business.

And all the questions she had for Lord when both parents had health crises at once that have required years of caregiving as an only child.

You will relate to everything Ruthie says. Because we don’t usually make ONE big pivot when our kids leave home. There are lots of pivots, adjustments and times of surrender until Jesus takes us home.

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You might also like:

God’s Direction for the Empty Nest Years with Misty Phillip

Getting Unstuck in the Empty Nest Years with Christa Hutchins

October 25, 2021 0 comment

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Episode 5 | Weathering Life’s Storms with Brenda McDearmon

Brenda McDearmon is a native Texan and empty nester who enjoys Uptown Dallas apartment life with her husband of 40 years, Mike.

Brenda has been my “online” friend for a while and this summer I actually got to meet her in person when I visited Dallas for a conference.

When you follow her blog, Texas Over Fifty and her Instagram account by the same name, you can’t help but see her approach to life which she describes as one of purposeful spirit and intentional adventure.

She is the author of The Big Hunker Down: 7 Take-Cover Strategies to Weather the Storm of Job Loss and Keep Your Destiny out of the Bar Ditch.

In this episode, we talk about weathering the storms in our lives. In her case, she and Mike have weathered the storm of job loss several times in their 40 years together.

No matter what storms we face, Brenda’s analogy of what you need to do to “hunker down” in a storm will resonate with you.

What does “hunker down” mean when weathering life’s storms?

Crouching down or taking cover or attention to a certain task or idea . Hunker down place of safety.

Safe place for you to weather a storm or difficulty.

A place of focused attention to get you through the storm.

Weathering Life’s Storms | Job Loss

Brenda and Mike sailed through the first 18 years of marriage with Mike on the fast track up the corporate ladder.

Words like down-sizing and corporate merger were not part of their vocabulary.

After all, their parents had worked for the same companies their whole lives and retired with pensions.

When Mike lost his job as the result of a corporate merger, they had a young family with 3 children. It was difficult and scary, but God worked it out.

Little did they know, they would experience this same scenario 3 more times.

Every time that God has taken us through the storm, we’ve hunkered down, made it through and come out with something better in many ways.

Ways to Hunker Down When Weathering Life’s Storms

Allow yourself to grieve.

Accept the things you cannot change. Don’t dwell on “I should have” or “what if” scenarios.

Hash it out with someone you trust for a set amount of time. During the job loss seasons, Brenda and Mike would set aside a certain amount of time every day to hash out the what ifs, pain, anger and disappointment. After that, they wouldn’t discuss it again and focus the rest of their time on moving forward.

Every test is part of our testimony and so accepting what you can’t change is living in anticipation of the end and what testimony you’ll have when it’s over.

Have a mindset of expectation and expect God to do big things.

Learn how to pray big prayers.

Let your thoughts, prayers and speech reflect that God is going to do big things.

Recite scripture out loud. Mike and Brenda would do this every day on their walks.

Use tools that will keep your mind right and focused on the Lord – books, podcasts, sermons, who you talk to.

Start every day with the Word of God.

Plan the party – even while you are waiting. Something you are going to buy or do that will help you remember this season and how God world it out.

Brenda said “It’s exciting to look back and see how God worked out each situation”

Working with God in building our faith does take time and it’s always worth it when we look back.

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Book: The Big Hunker Down: 7 Take-Cover Strategies to Weather the Storm of Job Loss and Keep Your Destiny out of the Bar Ditch.

Episode 4 | Building a Good Relationship with Your Adult Children with Suzy Mighell

Suzy Mighell is a Dallas-based Influencer and empty nester. She is the personality and content creator behind the popular blog and lifestyle brand Empty Nest Blessed.

EmptyNestBlessed.com is where Suzy shares everything that is important to us as empty nesters – from fashion and beauty, to travel, wellness, parenting, and more! She joyfully shares her life and faith with her followers while creating content to encourage, inspire, and bless them.

Suzy has been married to Bob for 30+ years and has 3 adult children.

A Good Relationship with Your Adult Children Starts with a Paradigm Shift

Lots of prayer about navigating this new season of parenting.
Learning self control and not saying everything that came to mind.
Being intentional in maintaining a relationship with adult children.
Being considerate and realizing the relationship has changed.
Your job raising them is done.

Your kids need to be able to invite you into their lives without feeling that you are going to intervene without their permission.

Suzy said she stopped looking at them as kids and started looking at them as interesting people with whom she wanted to pursue a relationship.

Build a Good Relationship with Your Adult Children by Blessing Them.

Blessing your adult children involves honoring and respecting them.

Encouraging and praising them.

Always find something to praise and be a positive voice in their lives.

Show your interest in their lives by asking good questions and listening.

Be a learner when they tell you about their jobs, friends and what they are interested in.

Be aware that their generation is different than yours.

If you see a behavior or attitude that you don’t understand, ask them about it.

Then, LISTEN WITHOUT PASSING JUDGEMENT.

Thank them for explaining their position to you.

Build a Good Relationship with Your Adult Children by Encouraging them Through Actions

Kindness and going the extra mile with their spouse or significant other.
“I love you” gifts, just because.
Asking how you can pray for them, then following up to let them know you prayed.

How to Pray for Your Adult Children | Six Bible Verses to Use

Six Practical Ways to Show Love to Your Adult Children

10 Ways to Help When Adult Children Are Questioning Their Faith

Top 10 Ways to Have A Great Relationship With Your Adult Children

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October 11, 2021 0 comment

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Episode 3 | Getting Unstuck in the Empty Nest Years with Christa Hutchins

Christa Hutchins is a chemical engineer who works as a project manager in the engineering and construction Industry.

In her coaching business, Do A New Thing, Christa equips busy communicators and leaders with project management and problem solving skills so they can turn their big ideas into a successful ministry or business. She is passionate about teaching women to find practical application of the Bible in their personal, professional and ministry lives.

In Christa’s weekly podcast, Just One Simple Thing, she offers tactical solutions, based on Biblical principles, plus just one simple action step in each episode.

New Direction in the Empty Nest

In the empty nest years, God wants to take whatever He’s already brought you, where He’s already invested in you, what He’s already taught you and amplify that in a new and different way.

8 Scripture Prayers for New Direction – Free Download

New View of Ministry

Ministry is not just the things we think of as “church” things. Leading Bible study. Working the nursery. Serving on the worship team.

Everything you see in the “out front” part of ministry has lots of behind the scenes management that takes place.

“Ministry is being faithful every day and using whatever skill you have in some way to be part of bringing people to Jesus”.

Looking for a New Direction? Dabble.

When we enter the empty nest season, we are often looking for that one thing God wants us to do next.

Christa suggests choosing 3-5 areas that you are interested in and “dabble’. Do small, low commitment jobs/tasks in each area for a time. A direction will become clear as you try out different things.

Don’t wait until you have clarity of direction before trying things.

“Clarity comes from action”.

What to do when you feel stuck

Sometimes the reasons we think we’re stuck aren’t the REAL reasons we’re stuck. Things like “I don’t know how to figure out the Instagram algorithm.” or “I don’t have enough money to hire an assistant” are what we think have us stuck.

The real problem is:

Lack of focus.
Lack of a plan.
Lack of accountability to help us do what we have committed to do.

Christa’s What Kind of Stuck Are You? Quiz shows you the REAL reason you are stuck and provides you with an action plan for your “type of stuck”, and simple, proven tools to get you moving again!

Embracing the Empty Nest Years

If you retire in your early mid-60s, you could have 20-25 years left to serve the Lord.

You want to find something that:

Is purposeful.
Feeds your soul.
Serves others.
Honors God.

While acknowledging that the empty nest years do include loss, Christa encourages us to embrace the new and what we are gaining. We gain many new opportunities to:

Serve.
Mentor.
Experience life in a whole new way.

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8 Scripture Prayers for New Direction – Free Download

October 4, 2021 2 comments

Podcast

Episode 2 | Stepping Into Purpose After Pain with Anita Morris

Anita Morris s the founder of the popular DIY Fashion Brand Anita by Design where she teaches women all over the world the basics of sewing their own clothes.

She’s also a speaker and best-selling author of Step Into It, Overcoming Life Trials that Lead to Purpose.

While Anita is so proud of her many accomplishments, she will tell you that they have come at a cost.

Pain.

Infidelity

Her husband, Cecil had an affair.

When Anita found out, she was devastated. Angry. Felt certain she was headed for divorce.

But by God’s grace, their marriage weathered the storm and recovered.

Living the Good Life

When Cecil retired, they were reaping the rewards of a long, committed marriage.

They were traveling.

They had plans.

Doing all the things they had dreamed of for this season of life.

Then came a devastating diagnosis.

Cecil had brain cancer. He died 8 months later.

Anita did not know how she would recover.

She cried out to God.

Anita cried out to God and heard these four words:

Stand
Trust
Endure
Proceed

New Purpose

Anita’s next assignment from God was to write the book, Step Into It, Overcoming Life’s Trials that Lead to Purpose.

It’s for women who need the reminder that God is still in control no matter what they are going through.

Her message is to take whatever it is that God has allowed in your life and step into the purpose for which he has created you.

Instead of asking. “What is my purpose?” your question should be, “What is God’s purpose for His Kingdom?”

Anita’s purpose is to “walk in obedience to the call using the gifts and talents he has given me.”

8 Scripture Prayers for New Direction – Free Download

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September 27, 2021 0 comment

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Episode 1 | God’s Direction for the Empty Nest Years with Misty Phillip

Misty Phillip is the author of The Struggle is Real, But So Is God, founder of Spark Media Ventures and host of top rated podcast By His Grace.

In this episode, Misty talks about how she asked for God’s Direction for the Empty Nest Years after 20 years of homeschooling her 3 sons.

This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase through one of these links, I will receive a commission at no extra cost to you.

Two Broken Arms

As Misty saw the empty nest years approaching, she began to think that she needed a new purpose after her homeschooling journey or she would drive her boys CRAZY.

Then she had a bicycle accident that resulted in two broken arms and a year of not being able to do anything for herself.

But in his kindness, God spoke his love over her and showed her that she was now the “older woman” with much wisdom to share with those coming up behind her.

God lead her to write The Struggle Is Real But So Is God Bible Study.

The Struggle is Real But So Is God

Each lesson in The Struggle is Real But So Is God takes a “hero” from the Bible, all of whom were far from perfect, and shows how God uses them.

Their problem was the same as ours – SIN.

But in this study, Misty shows us that:

Our battle is not with people but with principalities and wicked forces.
God has given us weapons and everything we need in his Word to fight these battles.
That even though life is messy and hard, God can still use us.

How to hear from God

Women often hear phrases like “God told me” or “I felt led to” and sometimes wonder “How did they know?” I asked Misty how she would respond to a woman who wanted to hear from God.

Come in a posture of surrender
Pray
Journal
Ask
Come open-handed with your gifts and ask the Lord “How do you want me to use my gifts in THIS season?”
Wait for an answer
Take the first step in faith. He will show you the next step and pave the way after that. God rarely shows you the whole plan at once.

8 Scripture Prayers for New Direction – Free Download

By His Grace Podcast

Six months before the release of The Struggle Is Real But So Is God, Misty started her podcast By His Grace.

By His Grace is where Misty and her guests share about life’s challenges, and how God’s grace, hope and love changes everything.

When By His Grace launched, Misty fell in love with podcasting. God showed her the significance of Christian podcasting in this day and age.

When God’s Direction Requires a Pivot

I asked Misty if she had ever poured her heart and soul into something that she felt God had called her to do, only to be led in a different direction? The answer was “Oh, yes!”

Misty said, “After you’ve written a book, people start asking , when are you going to write another?”

Misty DID write a book. 40,000 words on a deeply personal topic. An agent was very interested and began working with her. As the process proceeded, the agent asked Misty to make a number of changes that would make the book more appealing to publishers. Things just weren’t working out.

Misty’s husband could see what this was doing to her and asked her why she would pour all this time into a book project that clearly wasn’t working out and take time away from her podcasting.

It was hard, but Misty dropped the book she had worked so hard on and focused on the By His Grace Podcast.

The Spark Christian Podcast Conference

Misty found herself at another crossroads. She went before the Lord again with that same question:

Where do my gifting and calling line up for THIS season?

Two of Misty’s gifts are the gift of hospitality and connecting people.

For several years she had hosted a Christian Women’s Mastermind Group in her home, connecting, teaching and encouraging people.

From there, God gave her the vision for the Spark Christian Podcasters conference.

It was a dream that the Lord gave her that was beyond what she could do in her own strength.

She had never hosted a big event like this.

It was a day by day journey of asking the Lord for the next step.

Misty came with her yes and God opened doors that only He could open.

She took the first step and God was faithful to guide her to the next one.

What is your practice that keeps you growing in your relationship with the Lord?

Practice surrender – “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me”. Luke 9:23
Start your day in The Word of God so that you know what it says and can use it as a weapon to go against everything that is coming against you.